#14 CAMERAPHONE MODELS

This POEM is inspired by every MAN, WOMAN, and PASTOR who has ever turned themself into a Cameraphone Model.

Cameraphone Model…….by Nile Evans

Cameraphone model…have you NO ENDS?

Or is it because you have no real Friends?

To take a nice picture, for your peeps to see,

Why does your bathroom always look DIRTY?

Because you take pics, while your getting ready,

For us just to think…. you’re kinda lookin heavy.

You are so clever, takin pics in the mirror,

The fog from the sink ..dont make your skin look clearer.

Pucker your lips and give the peace sign,

Phone please don’t ring, while I’m shooting this time!

Look over the shoulder to show us your ass,

Cameraphone model you have so much Class.

Show your tattoo, because its so pretty,

Does it say DAYQUAN, right there on your titty?

I’m eager to see your new profile pic,

And I’ll send you the new one, I took of my………..

*finger snaps*

THIS IS YOUR PASTOR!

 

THERE’S A LOT OF THINGS I’M COOL WITH…BUT  “CAMERAPHONE MODELS”…

…IMCOOLONTHAT!!

COMMENTS BELOW ARE APPRECIATED!!!

PLEASE COPY AND SHARE LINK: http://bit.ly/CAMERAPHONEMODELS

FOLLOW ME ON TWITTER HTTP://TWITTER.COM/NILEEVANS

 

 

 

#13 “GAME VIOLATORS”

There’s a type of man out there that nobody respects…He comes in the form of…A Jealous Husband…A Boyfriend Stalker…or just some Bitchmade Man with too many girlish feelings. He goes against the basic rules of Mancode on a daily, which makes him a true …..VIOLATOR OF THE GAME.

“The difference between a Man and a Boy is that a Man is in control of his Emotions.”

Nile Evans 2009

I usually don’t delve into my personal life on Blog entries, but I’ve recently dealt with a silly bullshit situation in which I need to address.  I was lightweight dealing with a lil chick off and on and her “So called Boyfriend” sends me an email talking about how he knows she’s been seein me and how he lives with her and “that’s HIS girl” and that he thought I should know and for me to STEP OFF before something “HAPPENS”. (laughs to myself)  I read it…heard the pain and anger in his lil words and thought… WHAT PART OF THE GAME IS THIS?? Is he comin at ME???…REALLY?? Now for one, I can see if he thought I was wrapped up into this chick and was warning me that she had lied to me about her status…but then I thought….WHY WOULD YOU EVEN BE TRYIN TO SCARE ME AWAY?… so you can be with this chick WHO’S OBVIOUSLY MESSIN WITH ANOTHER GUY.  Does this young fella not know MAN CODE??

MAN CODE RULE #4093.1 – #4093.4

1. Respect THE GAME!
2. Don’t Hate the Player…Hate the Game!
3. Don’t ever call another MAN about YOUR chick. Deal with HER.
4. She’s NOT REALLY your chick…if she’s fuckin with HIM.

Pimps will be the first to tell you… “She chose me”….or…”It’s by choice, not by force”…meaning…When a woman chooses you or to be with you…IT’S HER CHOICE! What can you say to that?? Why would you be mad at HIM or even HER??…That should never be argued. There’s too many women in the world to choose from. If they want someone else then LET EM GO so that you don’t look like a LIL OL SILLY BITCH with a beard and crocodile tears rollin down your eyes. The homies don’t give hugs for that type of shit!!

There should NEVER…not NEVAH be a dude on the phone, text, email, facebook trying to threaten or harrass another Man about THEIR GIRL’S CHOICES. Because first off…YOU’RE MORE THAN LIKELY SETTING YOURSELF UP FOR AN ASS WHOOPIN. Secondly…AFTER HE WHOOPS YOUR ASS you’re only gonna think……”What did that Prove?….He still aint gonna stop hittin my chick.” GET SOME FUCKIN “MAN-UP JUICE” IN YOUR SYSTEM!!!!  I hate to see another generation of WEAK ASS MEN who Stalk chicks and get have to get their ASS BEAT by REAL ASS MEN because they didnt follow and respect the rules of THE GAME.  (all of this can easily be applied to Women as well)

THERE’S A LOT OF THINGS I’M COOL WITH…BUT  “GAME VIOLATORS”…

…IMCOOLONTHAT!!

COMMENTS BELOW ARE APPRECIATED!!!

PLEASE COPY AND SHARE LINK: http://bit.ly/GAMEVIOLATORS

FOLLOW ME ON TWITTER HTTP://TWITTER.COM/NILEEVANS

 

Tweet

#12 THE BARBIE MOVEMENT

Now, first off, let me say this! This is not at all an attack on Nicki Minaj in any way, because as Lil Wayne says…

“She Got That Good Good,  She Michael Jackson Bad, I’m Attracted To Her, For Her Attractive Ass.” (even though she raps like William Hung and Lil Kim had a retarted baby together)

…and speaking of NICKI’S ASS…here’s the BUT.  …BUT this Barbi Movement that Nicki’s started is really getting on my last fuckin nerve. First off, wanting to be like Barbie should be as innocent as a little boy liking The Power Rangers…BUT this Barbie Shit has spread out into Grown Ass BOOGAWOLF Women calling themselves Barbie’s. And not just Grown Women…but even the worst type of woman…HOODRATS!!! Hoodrats have taken to the Barbie Movement like they are truly going to somehow live vicarously thru Barbie the Toy’s life… It’s almost like in their mind they want to emulate Barbie as if to say “BARBI WAS A BAD BITCH!” Which is understandable considering that TO A HOODRAT Toy Barbie appears to live a GLAMOROUS LIFE if you factor in….

• Barbie’s always shopping and has Endless Amounts of Money. Recession Proof Barbie!
• Barbie’s Bedroom looks like it’s modeled after a Whore’s Dream Home…inside the PLAYBOY MANSION. Hoedown Barbie!
• The Love of her life/Babydaddy Ken lived with HER and was there for Barbie at her disposal.  BabyMama Barbie!
• Without a Steady Job she managed to have a Malibu Beach House and a Corvette. GoldDigger Barbie aka Superhead Barbie.

And Not to mention the biggest attraction of them all:

• SHE’S THE QUEEN OF LACEFRONTS!! HairDid Barbie.

Now I know that Black Women are at a loss for SuperHeros, BUT BARBIE?? C’MON BOO!! Barbie unbeknownst to most, had an array of black friends over the years, like Christie, Kara and Grace but out of all of them, I never saw K’Shawdrikanisha with the Burgundy Hair streaks Barbie….ANYWAY… if I see another one of these MEGARATS claiming to be a Barbie or with Barbie in their Twitter screenname, Im callin em out.

THERE’S A LOT OF THINGS I’M COOL WITH…BUT “THE BARBIE MOVEMENT”…

…IMCOOLONTHAT!!

Just too far….

COMMENTS BELOW ARE APPRECIATED!!!

PLEASE EMAIL AND SHARE LINK: http://bit.ly/BARBIESHIT

FOLLOW ME ON TWITTER HTTP://TWITTER.COM/NILEEVANS

#11 GUCCI MANE

The state of rap music is going under like the Titanic. We’ve long gone away from talented rhyming skills into autotuned up Rappers singing and chanting on every track…..THEN ALONG CAME GUCCI MANE!

As I write this I started to get happy that I was going to finally post something on my Nemesis Gucci, until I realized that I actually don’t have a problem personally with the Gentleman. I mean…He’s done nothing wrong in selling his music. He’s Never said anything to me personally…AND THEN IT DAWNED ON ME………..GUCCI’S JUST PART OF THE PROBLEM!!!!

THIS BIGGER PROBLEM I SEE IS IN ALL OF THE THE DUMB IGNORANT BASTARDS THAT ARE DRINKING THE GUCCI MANE KOOL-AID…FOR EXAMPLE:

• RECORD EXECUTIVES who would put this bullshit out.
• PROGRAM DIRECTORS in radio and television.
• MAGAZINES that say that he’s “RAPS NEXT BIG SUPERSTAR”
• YOUNG AMERICA who don’t know the difference between good and bad Music
• FOLLOWERS who will just take anything that is spoon fed to them.

These are the TOP 10 THOUGHTS that pop in my head when I hear GUCCI MANE Music..

1. DOES HE KNOW THAT RAP MUSIC NEEDS TO RHYME AT SOME POINT?
2. DID HE JUST SAY “NEMONADE”?
3. WHY DOES THIS BUMPKIN STILL WEAR ALL THAT FAKE JEWELRY?
4. MY SON BETTER GO TO COLLEGE!!!!
5. I BET GUCCI HAS PROBLEMS READING.
6. HIS LIPS LOOK LIKE TWO BURNT PORK SAUSAGE LINKS.
7. DIDN’T I HEAR THAT RHYME ON SESAME STREET???
8. “DANCE NIGGA DANCE”
9. IS THAT A POT BELLY UNDER A MISKEEN SHIRT? (WHO STILL WEARS MISKEEN?)
10. HE’D BE A GREAT SPOKESPERSON FOR SLAVERY

The problem I have with his music is that I feel that IT’S EVERYTHING THAT RAP MUSIC FOUGHT AGAINST. My generation (the Hip-Hop Generation) went from The Hood to Good and I think when you have DUMBED DOWN lyrics and only rely on Beats and Chants then you are being a “Necrophiliac of the Rap Game” (for those that have to google Necrophiliac IT MEANS THAT HE’S FUCKING SOMETHING THAT’S ALREADY DEAD!

THERE’S A LOT OF THINGS I’M COOL WITH…BUT GUCCI MANE…IMCOOLONTHAT!!

…oh yeah.. Wocka Flocka, OJ The Juiceman and definitely Plies too.

OUTTAKES:

HE’D BE A GREAT ACTOR IN A SLAVERY MOVIE

HE LOOKS LIKE A RUNAWAY SLAVE

HE’S AN INDICATION THAT SLAVERY IS GOING TO MAKE STRONG  RETURN

“GUCCI MANE” SHOULD BE RENAMED “SLAVEY MANE”

NOW LEAVE A COMMENT BELOW AND SHARE THIS WITH YOUR FRIENDS. http://bit.ly/GUCCIMANE

OH, AND SUBSCRIBE UP TOP!

FOLLOW @NILEEVANS ON TWITTER

#10 BLUETOOFERS

The Bluetooth headset is a much needed device, especially in California where the law says that you must use a hands-free device in order to talk on the phone while driving…but there is a distinct difference between a Bluetooth user and what I like to call a “Bluetoofer”

Bluetoofer – |ˈbloōˌtoōfur|  noun.  One who wears a Bluetooth headset as an accessory?

I’m so glad that the evolution of the Bluetooth Headset has finally steered away from the BLINKING BLUE “I NEED ATTENTION” LIGHT…that used to famously PISS ALL OF US OFF. You know that FOOL up in the club lookin like Levar Burton in Star Trek or somehow acting like he’s talking to Mission Control. As if we all don’t know that he can’t talk to anyone over the loud Lil Jon track Blaring inside the club.

The Bluetooth Headset is the equivalent of what a Beeper was back in the day. It gave the APPEARANCE of IMPORTANCE, until they were available to the Masses, which then diluted the image. Bluetoofers still think that having these gadgets are cool even though local swapmeets carry most of these products now in an under $20 bin.

These are the true characteristics of a Bluetoofer.

• He’s usually someone’s Uncle.
• He’s 35+ Years Old.
• He Might have been a Bus Driver at Some point in his life.
• He wears Mock Turtlenecks / Hardbottom Shoes with Jeans/ Black Leather Jackets
• He greets you with a Pimpy.. “WHAT IT DEW!!!”(even thought he’s too old for that.)
• He Watches a lot of Action Films/CSI Shows
• He looks like he hangs out with Charles Barkley
• He wears Sunglasses in the Club
• He’s an OFF-DUTY PASTOR.

BOTTOM LINE…WHEN YOU’RE DONE…PUT IT IN YOUR POCKET!!

THERE’S A LOT OF THINGS IM COOL WITH..BUT BLUETOOFERS…

….I’M COOL ON THAT!!!!!!

SHOUTOUT TO BLUETOOTHDOUCHEBAG.COM, A FUNNY SITE I FOUND WHEN RESEARCHING A PICTURE FOR MY POST.

#9 STILL BLAMING WHITE PEOPLE

It’s 2010, There’s a Black President now, and though we all haven’t gotten our “Obama Hookup” yet that we are owed. You know…

• HEY OBAMA, IMMA NEED A HOOKUP ON THESE TAXES.
• HEY OBAMA, IMMA NEED A HOOKUP ON THIS ROBBERY CASE IM FACING.
• HEY OBAMA, IMMA KILL MY WIFE IF SHE DON’T SHUT THE FUCK UP, SO CAN YOU HAVE SECRET SERVICE DISPOSE OF HER YAPPY ASS FOR ME PLEASE?

You know, just exploring all the new advantages that we’re SUPPOSED to get with having our own Black President.  Especially since White People have been having the hook-up for so many years. LOL…………  Yeah Right!!!

Anyway I say all of that to say, that it’s a new day in America and it’s about time we start taking responsibility for our own actions.  We can stop BLAMING WHITE PEOPLE for EVERYTHING….

WHITE PEOPLE DIDN’T MAKE YOU….

• …Not go to College.
• …Get that Neck Tattoo
• …Have 4 Babies by the Guy who didn’t go to College and has a Neck Tattoo.
• …Then Name those kids…MERCEDES, PORCSHA, MASERATI and LIL KIA (she’s got a different Daddy)

Now, surely SLAVERY and “THE WHITE MAN” have played a significant role in us being DISADVANTAGED and HAVING A FUCKED UP ECONOMY, so I will give credit where credit is due. But AT SOME POINT YOU HAVE TO LOOK AT “YOURSELF” for some of the mistakes YOU’VE made. Now, Lets look at some of the things…WHITE PEOPLE DID GIVE US.

BlackPlanet.com / AutoTune / Lamborghini Doors / Daisy Duke Shorts / The Art of Hairweaving / Grilled Cheese Sammiches / COCO aka Mrs. Ice -T…Need I say MORE?

THERE’S A LOT OF THINGS I’M COOL WITH… BUT STILL BLAMING WHITE PEOPLE FOR ERRYTHING…

…I’M COOL ON THAT!!!

@NILEEVANS on TWITTER

TO SHARE THIS COPY:  http://bit.ly/BLAMINGWHITEPEOPLE

I’M A COMMENT WHORE, SO LEAVE ONE DAMNIT!!!

#8 NBA GANGSTERS

GILBERT ARENAS & DELONTE WEST

Now I expect SUGE KNIGHT to shoot himself with a Pistol. He’s really into some gangster shit. But when you play a FUCKING GAME for a living and make MILLIONS OF DOLLARS TO DO IT…COME ON!! What is wrong with these SPOILED BABY Ball players that makes them want to act TOUGH?? No matter how many TATTOO’s you put on your ARMS HANDS AND FACE, you will NEVER be considered a TUFFGUY!

Lets start with this DUMMY…DELONTE WEST (RIGHT) from the Cleveland Cavaliers. This fool is DAMN NEAR WHITE or at least LIGHTSKINNED times A THOUSAND!!… SO WHY WOULD YOUR BRIGHT-ASS-FRECKLE-FACED-PEPPERMINT-PATTY-LOOKIN-ASS POSSIBLY NEED A GUN? He was riding on his motorcycle and speeding and got pulled over, for the police to find a handgun in his pocket, ANOTHER in his pant leg and a shotgun in a guitar case strapped to his back. DOES LEBRON RUN AROUND WITH GUNS ALL OVER HIS BODY?? NO!! He hires SECURITY or a GOON to keep one FOR HIM!! Take NOTES!! The only SHOOTOUT you need to be going to should involve a damn BASKETBALL you MEATHEAD!!

Old news but I have to give Honorable Mention the prime example of FOOLISHNESS…NFL’S PLAXICO BURRESS who shot HIMSELF in a club. AND NOW HE’S IN JAIL FOR IT!!

NOW FOR  RECENT GRAND FINALE!!

THE TWO SOFTEST GUYS IN THE NBA.. Washington Wizard’s Gilbert Arenas (LEFT) and (TEAMMATE) Javaris Crittenton recently PULLING PISTOLS ON EACHOTHER IN THE LOCKER ROOM!! Over a DAMN CARD GAME???!!! …and despite it being a $25 Thousand dollar bet umongst MILLIONAIRES… LETS KEEP IT IN PERSPECTIVE!! That’s like me pulling a pistol on my neighbor over a “$5 dollar” bet.  “YO! YOU OWE ME $5 BUCKS FOOL AND I WANT IT, OR I’M COMING UP TO OUR  MULTI-MILLIONDOLLAR JOB WITH A GUN  TO COLLECT MY MONEY!!!! You’re  NBA Players!!!! WE KNOW U AINT SHOOTIN NOBODY!!! But with Wanna-Be Gangster mentalities, I know what they’d all say in their defense.  They’d use the Words of their FEARLESS LEADER “BIG PERM” FROM THE MOVIE “FRIDAY” ….…”IT’S THE PRINCIPALITY OF IT ALL, SMOKEY!!!”…but you know what I’d say?…..

…THERES A LOT OF THINGS I’M COOL WITH…BUT NBA GANGSTERS…I’M COOL ON THAT!!!

@NILEEVANS on TWITTER  & To  Share this COPY… http://bit.ly/NBAGANGSTERS

COMMENTS ARE APPRECIATED(below)!

#7 CHITLIN’S (CHITTERLINGS)

Political Crusaders like Martin Luther King, Jr. Malcolm X, and the lovely Rosa Parks fought for Civil Rights and Freedoms that we now sometimes take for granted. They fought for Equality, Liberty, and the further Pursuit of Happiness for Minorities, and after all of that, can you please tell me one thing in this day and age..WHY IN THE FUCK ARE PEOPLE STILL EATING CHITTERLINGS??!!!

This is WAAAAY beyond me, why AFTER SLAVERY HAS BEEEEEN OVER fools still feel the need to eat THE COLON OF A PIG! Not the Colon of a Goat, who primarily has a Vegetarian diet, but they still WANT to eat PIG ASSHOLE.  Look, I don’t care how far in the South you live and or how much of a Delicacy you THINK they are…IT’S NOT A FUCKIN DELICACY! So let’s define Delicacy…Shall we?..

delicacy |ˈdelikəsē| noun ( pl. -cies)

1. the quality of being delicate, in particular 2. a choice or expensive food

______________________________________________________________________

For 1. Chitlin’s aren’t DELICATE

For 2. Chitlin’s aren’t EXPENSIVE

But 3. Chitlin’s are a not a CHOICE that even Slaves would’ve wanted in their Diet.

HERE’S WHAT I KNOW ABOUT “CHITLIN’S” (aka SHITLIN’S)

1. Slaves ate them because Slave Owners took the choice meats and left the Discarded Pieces to them.
2. They SMELL to High Heaven…maybe because they were once full of SHIT!
3. It has to be the most Disrespectful Piece of Meat that ANYONE could ever Serve.
4. We live in the year 2000’s and are no longer FENDING FOR FOOD SCRAPS. Homeless people don’t even eat Chitlin’s. WTF!
5. IF YOU HAVE TO CLEAN YOUR MEAT WITH BLEACH..SOMETHING IS NOT RIGHT!!!
6. Anyone who thinks that they’re good are still TOO CLOSE TO SLAVERY and might not know that we have a BLACK PRESIDENT. (yeah, it actually happened!)

Like Doo-Doo didn’t just come out of, what you call, food that you just SLATHERED Hot Sauce ON! Did you think that the Hot Sauce will disintegrate or somehow burn the FECAL MATTER off of your tongue?

Once you’ve realized that you’ve gotten your FREEDOM PAPERS, you can know that you no longer have to eat PIG ENTRAILS anymore.  And for those that want to leave me a comment like…”DAMN YOU NILE EVANS, CHITLIN’S TASTE GREAT!” I then want you to take your Hat off ,Curl it up in your hands and after doing a Handbone dance for me, REWRITE your comment like you would really say it ..”NO SIR, BOSS! I LOVES ME SOME CHITLINS! THEYS GOOD!”

THERE’S A LOT OF THINGS IM COOL WITH…BUT CHITLIN’S…I’M COOL ON THAT!

@NILEEVANS on TWITTER  & To  Share this COPY… http://bit.ly/CHITLINS

COMMENTS ARE APPRECIATED(below)!

#6 GHETTO BABY NAMES

There are common and uncommon names, in the world, but one thing I am sure of, is that there is some little Black Girl who is about to take her first breath into the world…see the first person in her world… and hear the worst name anyone could ever think of… in the World. “Oooh Girl! Yo new baby La-Tayshaniquamanesha is so beautiful” …Unfortunately her Mother and “Absentee” Father have set her up for a LIFE FAIL. To help avoid this we can follow a couple simple rules:

1. Do not try to mix your two names together. Shawn+Jeanetta does not = Shawnetta.  Kenya + Andre does not = Kendre [This is not a 90’s R&B Group (ex. BellBivDevoe or Jodeci)…this is your CHILD!]

2. Avoid the Prefix De, D’, La, Tay [Your not French or Italian]

3. Avoid the Suffix -isha  -ika -ita -etta -ay

4. Do not name your child after a car, type of purse or cologne or a dumb ass NOUN.

5. Avoid Actors and Athletes. We have enough Kobe’s and Beyonce’s to go around now.

See, names like that don’t make it to the Suburbs. They don’t go to College. They get pregnant at 16 just like her mother did…BECAUSE SHE CAME INTO THE WORLD  DISADVANTAGED,  AND NOT IN FINANCE, BUT IN MONIKER.

We all know the ramifications of having a BAD name, whether it’s BEING THE BUTT OF JOKES, EVERYONE KNOWING THAT YOU ARE FROM THE HOOD, OR MOST COMMONLY GETTING A JOB OTHER THAN THE FAST FOOD INDUSTRY.

But WHITE PEOPLE shouldn’t think they are exempt. These celebrities  Chris Martin (Coldplay) and Gweneth Paltrow named their child “APPLE”. Bruce Willis and Demi Moore: RUMER, TALULLAH BELL and SCOUT???? WOWZERS!… And fellow Black Celebrities like Tony Braxton with children named “Deizel” and “Denim”. This Broad named her kids Gas and Jeans!

Lets be creative People!! You don’t have to name your child, Sydney or Madison which I now group as GHETTO TRANSITION names, since some of these Hood Children damn sure don’t fit those names.  All I ask is that you be CREATIVE and MEANINGFUL, so that if the name does sound Mildly Ghetto, they can redeem it by saying  “KELAKAYKAY” means “Beautiful Spirit” in Swahili (*side eye look*)

My name is Nile (not NILES), a it’s a very self explanatory name and it’s of African descent. It’s originality makes it a creative choice, since there are not many that have the name, but it’s more AWESOME  because… I’M FUCKIN FINE!!! But anyway…

These are some ACTUAL GHETTO NAMES I have heard of and come across:

1. Peter Rabbit – This is come real childrensbook bullshit, but an actual name of a person I know.
2. Nemesis – Beautiful little girl with a HELL of a name.
3. Candida – Wikipedia : Of ..“YEASTS” and not cookin yeasts.
4. And the best of all is pronounced “Ab-suh-dee” but spelled… “ABCD”
5. MAN, WHAT THE FUCK?!… ABCD??  Maybe it would be more fitting if her name was: “ABCDENT” …because that’s what she was!! Yet, I digress…

THERE’S A LOT OF THINGS I’M COOL WITH…..BUT GHETTO BABY NAMES???… I’M COOL ON THAT!!!!

*PLEASE LEAVE A COMMENT BELOW!!!*

@NileEvans on Twitter

COPY & SHARE ON TWITTER : http://bit.ly/GHETTOBABYNAMES

photo credit :karim Iliya

#5 LIL MAMA

LIL MAMA'S "MYSPACE FACE"

I know this is OLD, but I can’t say that the “Lil Mama Incident” isn’t still BOTHERING THE HELL OUT OF ME. I know that HATE IS SUCH A STRONG WORD…SO LETS JUST SAY…I’M COOL ON LIL MAMA.

How can a SINGLE “NOBODY” ruin…quite possibly the BEST ANTHEM SONG of this Decade (since Tupac’s California Love)?  Jay-Z and Alicia Key’s “EMPIRE STATE OF MIND” is a masterfully composed song that will make any Non-New Yorker feel the Pulse of the Great City.

UNFUCKINFORTUNATELY…during one of the BEST EVER VMA PERFORMANCES THAT WE HAVE EVER WITNESSED…..A little CHICKENHEAD from Brooklyn by the name of Lil Mama was feeling the Pulse of the City a little too much… and RUINED IT FOR US ALL.

(ON STAGE) JAY-Z to LIL MAMA: “OH, SO YOU GONNA T-PAIN IT?” (referring to T-Pain jumping  on stage UNINVITED to a Hov performace, weeks prior to the VMA’s)

Jay’s entrance was FLAWLESS!!! Pulling up, walking the hallway, taking the cap…then rising up on the stage like that to an ENGORGED RADIO CITY MUSIC HALL!!! Alicia “FINE ASS” Keys on THE KEYS singing the hook just like it sounds on the album!!! The crowd ERUPTS as they perform!!! I GET HYPED JUST THINKING ABOUT IT!!…..but NOW, I can’t even play the song without thinking about THIS Little MANFACED GIRL marching up on stage, like she had a verse… produced…wrote…composed….OR had ANYFUCKINTHING to do with the song.

BUT I KNOW WHAT HAPPENED….See, she figured that since she was on an MTV SHOW (A.B.D.C) that she had Carte Blanche at an MTV EVENT. Only because she thinks she’s got an EMPLOYEE PASS.  I wish I coulda been there to tell her, ”HEY LIL BROAD….DON’T NOBODY KNOW YOU!”  Then we all saw the later released video of BEYONCE trying to HOLD HER BACK. Now why wouldn’t you listen to JAY’S WIFE?? HIS OWN WIFE WOULDN’T HAVE JUMPED ON STAGE…. THAT’S JUST DISRESPECTFUL ON ALL LEVELS!!!!

Then MR. MAMA puts out that PSEUDO APOLOGY, where she NEVER actually apologizes, and said that she just got caught up, because the song was about HER CITY. WELLLL, HOW ABOUT…the rest of the NEW YORKERS that were in attendance at the Awards that DIDN’T jump they ass on stage?  Man, I just STILL can’t stand the AUDACITY of this chick.

Now, I know right now you’re probably saying “BUT WHAT ABOUT KANYE?”…and I’ll  say this…”

KANYE’S GOT HITS…LIL MAMA HAD A SINGLE.

KANYE’S GOT GRAMMY’S…LIL MAMA WONT BE INVITED TO THE GRAMMYS.

KANYE’S EXPECTED TO ACT A FOOL….LIL MAMA JUST LOOKS LIKE ONE.

BUT TO KANYE’S CREDIT… I CAN’T SAY I DIDN’T AGREE WITH HIM IN HIS STATEMENT. BEYONCE “DID” HAVE A BETTER ALBUM IN MY OPINION AS WELL. But I digress…..

“LIL BOW WOW THE GIRL needs to sit her ass down and not be seen for a long while…OR EVER AGAIN…..(WHICHEVER COMES FIRST).”

THERE’S A LOT OF THINGS I’M COOL WITH…..BUT LIL MAMA???… I’M COOL ON THAT (BROAD)!!!

@NileEvans – twitter

To share COPY: (http://bit.ly/LILMAMA)