#14 CAMERAPHONE MODELS

5 01 2011

This POEM is inspired by every MAN, WOMAN, and PASTOR who has ever turned themself into a Cameraphone Model.

Cameraphone Model…….by Nile Evans

Cameraphone model…have you NO ENDS?

Or is it because you have no real Friends?

To take a nice picture, for your peeps to see,

Why does your bathroom always look DIRTY?

Because you take pics, while your getting ready,

For us just to think…. you’re kinda lookin heavy.

You are so clever, takin pics in the mirror,

The fog from the sink ..dont make your skin look clearer.

Pucker your lips and give the peace sign,

Phone please don’t ring, while I’m shooting this time!

Look over the shoulder to show us your ass,

Cameraphone model you have so much Class.

Show your tattoo, because its so pretty,

Does it say DAYQUAN, right there on your titty?

I’m eager to see your new profile pic,

And I’ll send you the new one, I took of my………..

*finger snaps*

THIS IS YOUR PASTOR!

 

THERE’S A LOT OF THINGS I’M COOL WITH…BUT  “CAMERAPHONE MODELS”…

…IMCOOLONTHAT!!

COMMENTS BELOW ARE APPRECIATED!!!

PLEASE COPY AND SHARE LINK: http://bit.ly/CAMERAPHONEMODELS

FOLLOW ME ON TWITTER HTTP://TWITTER.COM/NILEEVANS

 


 

 

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49 responses

5 01 2011
JesSofiaValle

(Spanish accent) Goowow!

5 01 2011
Solo4Prez

Haaa, But we need cellphone models, how else will get random titty pics from a chick you just met Lol

5 01 2011
frank

Yea, especially as we’re starting a new year…people have to leave these ghetto portraits in 2010’s bathrooms

5 01 2011
@AprylLuv

Hi-lar-i-ous.

5 01 2011
t0rdo0r

Lmaooooo I love you 🙂

5 01 2011
Gregory W

Nile. that is def some funny mess for me to hear at 2am!!! LMBO!!

“The fog from the sink ..dont make your skin look clearer.” *Classic line*

5 01 2011
JCS

Laughed so hard, i can now go to sleep!

5 01 2011
JayKay

Hilarious! They neeeeeeded to hear this one Nile…& is that a turd tho? Ughh smh…

5 01 2011
nylahsmomma

I’m weak from laughing. Men and women alike do this. I admit, I have a few. NEVER with a big dookie in the pot. But I guess the bathroom give folks an extra boost of confidence. She had just dropped a load and was feeling herself… Not cool that she was still smelling herself, litterally.

5 01 2011
tina

HILARIOUS!!! You are a true poet!!!
I love your coolonthat posts You are the BEST!!!

5 01 2011
Bchimere

This is too good. Nile you have done it again. Just when I thought I was the only one confused about what agency the “cameraphone models” were signed with. Thank you for the laughs!!

5 01 2011
Angie

Lol! Nile you are too funny!

5 01 2011
Georgina

Great job as always Nile…that’s not my pastor

5 01 2011
loriann_linn@yahoo.com

You are HILARIOUS Nile!!!!! lolllll

5 01 2011
Monica

“…why does your bathroom always look dirty”….ha I love it. I can’t stand cell phone photographers. Glad you are putting it out there….I shall spread the word =0}

5 01 2011
DB Frick

Loved the poem. Did you steal that from William Butler Yeats the great Irish poet?

5 01 2011
Fred Chappell

Good one.

5 01 2011
Melissa

Who knew you could spit hot rhymes!!! Bathroom/cameraphone pics are played out like myspace…find a friend to help you out!

5 01 2011
Aaronboy

Hahahaha! too funny! 🙂

5 01 2011
QT_4U

Im a cameraphone model with manners, no dirty bathroom pics or messy room! LMAOO! I enjoyed ur poem. Anyway apart frm the obvious, why her bra & panties don’t match? hahahahahaha………….Nile, share with us ur cameraphone pics ; ) Great topic as always : ))

5 01 2011
Stephani

I was just talking to my sister about this, now I am guilty of a couple pictures…but these chicks/dudes, mainly chicks with filth and scum in the backgraound and summers eve through the reflection of the mirror, dirty laundry or dishes…or a naked picture with a toddler sitting on the floor looking up at mommys booty.. #fail… haha camera phone models I’m cool on that too.

5 01 2011
Deanne

Hahaha!! Once again you had me dying laughing. The picture you posted is hilarious. You should take one just for the hell of it.

5 01 2011
LaShanda

I have a question – If you’re that low budget that you think a shower curtain is the bomb ass back drop, then why not look at the picture first before you share it with everyone else, dummy???!!! Make sure you flush the toilet and clean the shower, pick those dirty clothes up and empty the damn garbage and most importantly, close the door so that your kids aren’t looking up at you hiking your leg up on the sink, trying to look sexy!!! Better yet, is there any other room in your shack that looks a little less disease infested??? This is just nasty! Major fail!!!!!!!!

5 01 2011
LT

#POW

i never understood the bathroom shots anyway O_o

5 01 2011
DVisionary

HYSTERICAL!!! Yet…too true!

6 01 2011
Keith

Nice flow! I especially like, “Show your tattoo, because its so pretty, Does it say DAYQUAN, right there on your titty?” Hilarious! That’s pure Seuss… well, except for the titty part.

6 01 2011
Misty

Ummmmmm………yeah………….I…………(eyes shifting to the left) have NO idea why people take pictures of themselves in their bathroom mirrors…………. (??????????????) (ummmmm……I would, umm, NEVER do that…(ahem) EVER…(eyes shifting to the left.)

*SIGH* Okay, FINE! I do that. But at least my bathroom is clean, Nile………….and so are my pictures….(eyes shifting to the left!) lol, jk. 🙂

😀 **cheesy grin**

I love reading your stuff. Thanks for sharing.

6 01 2011
Tee

Wow…

6 01 2011
kandace

LOL!! I was having a bad day until I read this:)

6 01 2011
Russell J

LOL @ “Does it say DayQuan on your titty”
I absolutely detest this fad, I learned on one social network be afraid of these people who have these shots as the majority of their posted pics #unstable #crazy LOL

6 01 2011
Suga

That was a good read Nile.I was laughing my behind off; however, I didn’t have to see the gal with her “kid swimming in the pool in the background”. Yuck! I look forward to more reads.

6 01 2011
Nene Favors

Woooooow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! hahahahaahaa *deletes all pic phone pics off my facebook* hahaahahahah

6 01 2011
DeShawn

I take lots of pics with my camera phone! But at least I flush the toilet! LOL! Good job!

6 01 2011
Nina

that’s shit was hilarious…damn that pic says it all!!

6 01 2011
Jenn

That is classic!

6 01 2011
Berenice

Umm.. I loved the post.. but that first picture was double gross! (Always have a great laugh from your posts… thanks Nile!)

6 01 2011
JanetB82

lol…thank you for bringing to light that bathroom+aliltoomuchtime= built in iPhone ‘inner ho’ app

6 01 2011
Machelle

OMG Nile!!!! Where did you find that 1st pic??? And yes…I am too am sooooooo sick and tired of seeing these camera phone models. Like seriously…get off yourself!

6 01 2011
Rosie

forget the turd, can she get a matching set of bra n panties?

you’re hilarious, Nile. you crack me up every time 🙂

6 01 2011
Lena

It makes us look skinnier! LMAO U a fool!

6 01 2011
maiysha

this is too funny!! Iv taken a couple cameraphone self shots but always feel stupid after, so… yea…done with that.

6 01 2011
Poundcake

I am a proud camera-phone model! I am thoroughly OFFENDED by this! I only take CLASSY photos! How dare you judge my profession by bootleg and classless wannabes that take horrid photos?!? Ugly, pucker faced, peace fingered, in the closet tight shirt wearing Bishops and fat lumpy cows cannot be compared to us REAL camera-phone models!! Hmph! However you are a brilliant writer and I will share this offensive writing with my fellow camera-phone model folks on facebook and twitter! 🙂
Keep up the fabulous work handsome!

6 01 2011
Jessica

I LOVE IT! I KNOW PEOPLE THAT DO THAT ALL THE TIME F’N HILARIOUS

6 01 2011
tiff

lmao 🙂

6 01 2011
rebeccakhammar9

LOL! CLASSIC!!!

6 01 2011
SoFresh Negrodamus

This is thigh-slap-trip-over-your-own-feet funny! Beyond hysterical and of course so true! I wouldn’t expect anything less coming from you tho! LMAO @Camera Phone Model! I tell you, technology has given anyone with an ego too many means of outlets for their single-self-marketing! Uuugh! Love your creative take on it!
*Ad-Lib* Why must you put your camera so high, so that all we can see is your angled eye? You look like you’re from OZ- a Lion, Tiger or Bear OH MY! Perhaps you should practice being phone-camera shy!

7 01 2011
sabrina

these people are soo sad…lol…and im sad for knowing some of them…hahahahaha

7 01 2011
Mscreative1

☛Lmao☚☺

17 03 2011
Shbychictae

Hilarious!!! And Sad at the same time because it is soooo true… Good insight Nile!!

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