#8 NBA GANGSTERS

15 01 2010

GILBERT ARENAS & DELONTE WEST

Now I expect SUGE KNIGHT to shoot himself with a Pistol. He’s really into some gangster shit. But when you play a FUCKING GAME for a living and make MILLIONS OF DOLLARS TO DO IT…COME ON!! What is wrong with these SPOILED BABY Ball players that makes them want to act TOUGH?? No matter how many TATTOO’s you put on your ARMS HANDS AND FACE, you will NEVER be considered a TUFFGUY!

Lets start with this DUMMY…DELONTE WEST (RIGHT) from the Cleveland Cavaliers. This fool is DAMN NEAR WHITE or at least LIGHTSKINNED times A THOUSAND!!… SO WHY WOULD YOUR BRIGHT-ASS-FRECKLE-FACED-PEPPERMINT-PATTY-LOOKIN-ASS POSSIBLY NEED A GUN? He was riding on his motorcycle and speeding and got pulled over, for the police to find a handgun in his pocket, ANOTHER in his pant leg and a shotgun in a guitar case strapped to his back. DOES LEBRON RUN AROUND WITH GUNS ALL OVER HIS BODY?? NO!! He hires SECURITY or a GOON to keep one FOR HIM!! Take NOTES!! The only SHOOTOUT you need to be going to should involve a damn BASKETBALL you MEATHEAD!!

Old news but I have to give Honorable Mention the prime example of FOOLISHNESS…NFL’S PLAXICO BURRESS who shot HIMSELF in a club. AND NOW HE’S IN JAIL FOR IT!!

NOW FOR  RECENT GRAND FINALE!!

THE TWO SOFTEST GUYS IN THE NBA.. Washington Wizard’s Gilbert Arenas (LEFT) and (TEAMMATE) Javaris Crittenton recently PULLING PISTOLS ON EACHOTHER IN THE LOCKER ROOM!! Over a DAMN CARD GAME???!!! …and despite it being a $25 Thousand dollar bet umongst MILLIONAIRES… LETS KEEP IT IN PERSPECTIVE!! That’s like me pulling a pistol on my neighbor over a “$5 dollar” bet.  “YO! YOU OWE ME $5 BUCKS FOOL AND I WANT IT, OR I’M COMING UP TO OUR  MULTI-MILLIONDOLLAR JOB WITH A GUN  TO COLLECT MY MONEY!!!! You’re  NBA Players!!!! WE KNOW U AINT SHOOTIN NOBODY!!! But with Wanna-Be Gangster mentalities, I know what they’d all say in their defense.  They’d use the Words of their FEARLESS LEADER “BIG PERM” FROM THE MOVIE “FRIDAY” ….…”IT’S THE PRINCIPALITY OF IT ALL, SMOKEY!!!…but you know what I’d say?…..

…THERES A LOT OF THINGS I’M COOL WITH…BUT NBA GANGSTERS…I’M COOL ON THAT!!!


@NILEEVANS on TWITTER  & To  Share this COPY… http://bit.ly/NBAGANGSTERS

COMMENTS ARE APPRECIATED(below)!

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86 responses

15 01 2010
Asia

LMAO!!!so true!!whats wrong wit these niggas????If they want protection they should hire a goon or two.smh.if they dumb enough to do stupid shit like carry arnd illegal guns and pull them out over a damn card game,they deserve to be caught.they getting paid waaaaay too much for us to put up with their fuckery.throw that dumb nigga in jail!!!

15 01 2010
Jazmin

LOL…ok this is too funny, and sad at the same time. what i never understood is WHY west had so many guns on him…WHYYYYY???

15 01 2010
Madisellah Rocha

Absolutely ridiculous… Jeopardizing your lively hood over “5 dollars” Oh, but it’s the principality of it all LMAO!

15 01 2010
K.Solomon

LMAO @ BRIGHT-ASS-FRECKLE-FACED-PEPPERMINT-PATTY-LOOKIN-ASS… F’N
hysterical

15 01 2010
Nicole

this is a funny blog but underneath the comedy is a hella lot of truth I shake my head everytime I hear about one of these fools doing some dumb shit, If I made millions you couldn’t pry my ass outta my million dollar house for nothing and I would never get in trouble. Anybody who gets paid that kind of money to play a game that so many others do for free should feel grateful and blessed now they all gotta pay

15 01 2010
baiki

Lol.. What are they doin with guns?? smh.. You went in on them tho.. Haha..

15 01 2010
Keana

Lmao..this is 2 funny&its ridiculous at tha same time…once u reach a certain status n life some things u just shouldnt do and this is 1 of em…and wat about ron artest??

15 01 2010
MzLilphat

LOLOLOLOL**I want commment, but I am still laughing** I have been saying the same thing. I would like to say what the hell was you thinking, but obviously you weren’t thinking. C’mon people have we not learned anything from T.I. or are you under the impression that professional sports players are “Untouchable”. Blantant Stupid is so last year.

15 01 2010
ChuuuuCCCKKK

if they wanted to stay gangster they should have picked up a gun in a the first at least those dumb ass niggas would be in jail and not be celebrated and idolized by kids who are the future of this country!!! Nice!!

15 01 2010
[pronounced rah-nee-see-ah]

this post is HI-larious!
my question is why do they have guns anyway?!

15 01 2010
Slap K.

LOL had to come show my appreciation! I’m w/ u 100% Nile, niggaz would rather do the T.I. before the “Tiger”. In addition to the tattooos lol Let’s not forget these niggas gettin’ their neck tatted like it makes em GANGSTER as well. (JR SMITH got YOUNG MONEY ON HIS NECK, are u fuckin’ serious?) That shit about D.West is too funny. Shotgun in guitar case? Nigga was thinkin’ Desperado & now Arenas lookin’ like a damn fool! w/ all these NBA players packin’ heat.. I got a new meaning behind NBA (Nothin’ But Assassins) or wannabes for that matter! -Pals

15 01 2010
Swirl P.

Always the correct!! Bryant Gumble(?) did a piece on NFL players carrying guns and them saying they felt like targets off the field. This BS is no where near the same! NBA players have been tryin to thug it for years tho. Tryin to be harder than their real image. Why? Who knows! Good piece… AGAIN!

15 01 2010
QT_4U

LMAOOO!! this is funny as fuck! I got a whole new way of looking at NBA playas now… Someone ought to tell them why they tryna get back in the hood, isn’t their purpose to leave that lifestyle for good??!! smh.. on another note, wonder how much their game wld cost to watch if they came to Singapore – yummy… Chocolate Deelite buffet! I love this write-up!! Kudos Mr Nile Evans – once again u talk the Real deal!

15 01 2010
ericasharlette

Got me rolling as usual! You had me creating a visual of Delonte White as a Terminator-style Rose from the Golden Girls……Ohhh why must you be so damn funny?!?

Not an NBA dude or guns but it’s right up there (to me anyway) with Antwoin Tanner (Skillz from One Tree Hill) and his government cheque money-laundering scandal…Bottom line is people who commit crimes at LEAST need to have the wack-arse excuse that they “have nothing else”; but if you’re talented and successful with it, to be involved in anything criminal / reckless / dangerous is SO beyond ridiculous that you really need to slap yourself and die painfully.

15 01 2010
Virginia Gonzalez

LOL @ MEATHEAD!!!!! WAY TO BRING ARCHIE BUNKER IN THE MIXXX!!!!!

15 01 2010
Melissa

This is an example of ” when keeping it real goes bad!” these idiots are just that-IDIOTS!!!

15 01 2010
Stacey Marie Robinson

lol @ “when keeping it real goes bad”…they’re trying so hard, for what?!?!

15 01 2010
MeSBee

OK wait…
Did this dude just say “This fool is DAMN NEAR WHITE or at least LIGHTSKINNED times A THOUSAND!!”
I’m still trying to get past that! LIGHTSKINNED x 1,000!! LMAO!!! That’s a WHOLE LOTTA LIGHT SKINNED!
Celebrities/rich folks who tote guns, break laws and do dumb shit should be stoned. If I had $ like that, I’d be home all day swimming in pools of coins like Scrooge McDuck! Your only job in life is to bounce a basketball, fuck bitches and be rich! How hard can that be!? I have ZERO sympathy for these tards.
End of story. Great post. Keep em comin.

15 01 2010
LilMama3

LMAO Funny but true why do you need a gun when you play bball?

15 01 2010
Roc

The killa part of this story is that half to none of these nigga’s even came from or ever been in a environment where they had to or needed to carry one.

15 01 2010
Nina Akiaten

OMG NILE…Light skinned, BIG PERM…my hands are up in the air waving shaking my head laughing soo hard…I bow to the master blaster !!! Nile you are truely an inspiration of a good smart ass….TELL IT BRATHA!!! aaaaagh…hahahahaha!!

15 01 2010
alice

This is hilarious…and apparently these brothas have no clue on what to do with their millions! except act like a bunch of dumb-asses :/
Thanks for the Laughs!

15 01 2010
Jamil

Hysterical!!!

15 01 2010
Rene

This was fantastic Nile! I have always wondered why some players feel the need to carry fire arms on their person. Is there really that much of a threat? And as you mentioned……wouldn’t it be much easier to hire someone to carry the gun for them? Any how…….I really enjoyed your blog…..as always!!!! Thanks!

15 01 2010
CANDACE

Your writing is very well articulated, I love that about these posts. It’s obvious that you don’t just think of some shit and write it down! kudos to you it was good!!

15 01 2010
Stacey Marie Robinson

for real! even nile’s tweets are well articulated. no spelling errors and everything’s so freakin clever…that’s the sign of a REAL writer….love it!

15 01 2010
pri-diddy

absolutely on point!
i bet non of these cats had any clout on the streets before the NBA young $$ = retardation

15 01 2010
twalkuf

GENIUS! I found out how many guns West had on him while listening to ESPNRadio and damn near swerved off the interstate. and as far as Gilbert ‘doughboy’ Arenas, you really have to have some type of chromosome defect to throw away 80 million dollars. GET REAL and HIRE someone to carry a gun for you…and Plaxico should have gotten the death penalty for killing his nuts. that is all

15 01 2010
ReLyn

Nile you have done it again….I am over here laughin my ass off. The truth is scary but funny..Naggas putting their lively hood in jeopardy over something so foolish. If that aint a Bitch ass move fighting over game cards. lmaooooo they have the “too much too soon syndrome” spoiled ass babies…these naggas are 51 cards short of a full deck.

15 01 2010
Neek

Of course the normal people wouldn’t take a dumb risk like this…but when you have $, you may rationalize dumb behavior because you can afford to.

15 01 2010
brosnan_fresh

RIGHT! or just any shit involving dumb athletes/celebrities. dishing out their own justice, when by themselves have more money than africa! how can you not afford to hire someone at the very least to handle your business, instead of getting caught up in robberies, assaults, and weapons charges. i think every time one of these dumdums gets caught or charged with a ignorant crime, how about they take all their money and give it to a charity, that way they can take their hustle/thug/gangster mentality to the streets for real.

15 01 2010
Octavia Yancey

LOL!!! Why that brotha gotta be “light skinned times a thousand”??? LMAO

Once again, Mr. Evans..well done sir! 😉

15 01 2010
BKMiss

Got some bad news and this just really cheered me times a thousand.

15 01 2010
Parfine

lmao…seriously who do these guys think they are?? i hope they get whatever jail time is put on them times a thousand…soo stupid! but i guess for those who leave the streets and get into the game so young, they still haven’t had time to mature and still contain that “hood mentality”….kinda sad if anything.

15 01 2010
@Ghostwriter010

That was too funny!! But damn they look good!!

15 01 2010
Audizzle

ROFLMAO@BRIGHT-ASS-FRECKLE-FACED-PEPPERMINT-PATTY-LOOKIN-ASS

Testosterone levels are through the roof! I suspect JUICING with a splash of Hennessey and being small in the pants… I blame the ladies too, sorry.

15 01 2010
MachFizzy

If I made that kinda of paper I’d live in an upscale Caucasian neighborhood. That way my black ass would have no need to be strapped like a SWAT cop all day. If niggas wanna see me holla at me via Ustream. Shit!

15 01 2010
Brandior

I’ve read a few articles on these dudes n there drama. THIS shit was hilarious x a thousand. LMAO

15 01 2010
Adrian Henderson

Gilbert is a damn fool! Delonte is Bi-Polar so he get a pass. Why would any pro athlete would leave the house with guns? Why not bodyguards? And if the club is so important then bring the party to you! You’re rich fuckers! Act like it.

15 01 2010
Isley

Hysterical!!!!!

15 01 2010
Stacey Marie Robinson

I’m amazed how many millionnaires are out there f-ing up and acting a fool like things are that hard. They’re rich! They have numerous options…and still choose the “poor” man’s option!

Hilarious Nile! Hilarious, as always!

15 01 2010
nyareu

Dang I agree wit u, they sure are actin foolish over simple things. Kinda makin them look cocky for roles ppl shuldnt even want to be.

15 01 2010
Anjali

hahahah awesome

16 01 2010
Brandale

On point… I am getting kinda sick of the CHEDDAR BOB ass negroes….

16 01 2010
Tamara

LMAO…this is true! And hilarious. Peppermint-Patty-Lookin-Ass..
A shotgun in a guitar case? Pulling guns in the locker room? Fukk outta here! LOL…”Hood mentality”.

16 01 2010
Renee

Hilarious!!! “THE TWO SOFTEST GUYS IN THE NBA.. Washington Wizard’s Gilbert Arenas (LEFT) and (TEAMMATE) Javaris Crittenton recently PULLING PISTOLS ON EACHOTHER IN THE LOCKER ROOM!! Over a DAMN CARD GAME???!!!” Man Arenas was my fav Wizard too, when he mentioned his all time fav NBA player and role model was Penny Hardaway in 06 I thought he was going to do some good things… but turn gangster???? nah now know ImCOOLonTHAT…

16 01 2010
Tonette Lansdowne

I pray Stern gives Arenas another chance. He is young. This is a great opportunity to lose. I hope Arenas has learned his lesson. IMHO.

16 01 2010
jamal jennings

Pathetic . These guys are just NBA IDIOTS. They’re the guys told to go play a sports because they’re common sense will not take them anywhere.

16 01 2010
MsCaliElise

lmaooooooo I knew before I started this would be a riot Peppermint-Patty-Lookin-Ass, naw these niccas are softer then a sponge cake just baked all fluffy shit. If these niccas actually formed a thought and used their brains they would be dangerous….lmaooooo@Nile you are crazy, I am laughing so loud I am snorting.

16 01 2010
Tee Arthur

Yeah , this I’d “Black” angst misdirected. These players need to be investing in the communities they come from.. Find new avenues to enjoy themselves.. Travel.. Take inner city kids on trips.. Fuck mad hoes.. Anything but buy guns.. And wait to fuck it life up.. We got enough cats in the hood doing that who have no means to do the other things I mentioned. Will it end? Not as long as the era of the “G” is upon us.. In music,Movies and apparently, in the leagues.. They all wanna be FEARED.

16 01 2010
Lena

You are a fool Nile! LOL ‘Just like me coming to collect $5’ LMAO

16 01 2010
atirehs

ROFL @ “light skinned times a thousand”! that was hilarious!
but yeah Gilbert Arenas’ situation is retarded. Delonte is bi-polar and might not have been “all the way right” that day. but the image of him strapped like that on a motorcycle is kinda crazy and funny at the same time…

16 01 2010
Dame Syllabust

“shotgun in a guitar case strapped to his back.” OMG *dead* @that. Since when did it become cool to pretend to be El Mariachi from Desperado? And for pulling pistols because of a card game. I have not words, but a infinite wtf face.

16 01 2010
nileevans

LMAO @ “INFINITE WTF FACE”

16 01 2010
Vanessa G

Preach it Nile. You should’ve thrown rappers in this one too. After hustling all your life and then you make it into the rap game and are a million dollars richer these fools still doing dumb shit to land themselves in JAIL!! Is this to bring up their credentials on being the baddest mofos on the planet?

This one was really funny, very well put.

16 01 2010
Leonard

“He was riding on his motorcycle and speeding and got pulled over, for the police to find a handgun in his pocket, ANOTHER in his pant leg and a shotgun in a guitar case strapped to his back. ”

Wow. That’s pretty dumb but I understand. After I saw “Desperado” with Antonio Banderas I wanted a guitar case full of guns too. Problem is, where do you get an empty guitar case?

16 01 2010
Kish

Hahahahahaha!!!! Good one Nile! They work so hard to make it to where they are and mess it up over stupid stuff… SMH…

16 01 2010
ERIN ADAMS

they are very spoiled big baby’s, lol. so funny but so true

16 01 2010
LuserComedy

This shit got me so upset. First I have to say, this guy Gil just ruined my fantasy basketball team, He is a fucking idiot. Second majority of these ball players have been good their whole life so they have been catered to their whole life. There is no way anybody in the NBA is really a gangster. Let Gil and I switch financial status, No tats, no guns just the Goons watching my back. Thats what them niggas get paid for. Gil is a Modern day Idiot.

@lusercomedy

16 01 2010
Tommy Tnez

YEZZIR!!!!

16 01 2010
russellj

man I dont understand these dumb azz fools…100 mil contract bout to be down the drain, and I dont even know what to say about that albino muthafucka riding around like he is starring in a bad B movie. smdh

16 01 2010
NightTimeAJ

LMAO at your description of Delonte’s Freckled Peppermint Patty Ass. His Ass Looks Like Raggedy Ann and shit. He is such a goon, why was he trying to be Blade, last time i checked there are no vampires in the hood. SMDH

16 01 2010
Cynthia

That last story was sooo “ric-diculous” when i heard about it. You guys are getting paid over 10 grand for each game, and you’re gonna fight over 20 dollars. That’s like two crack heads going at it for 2 dollars! Seriously, I think somebody should sit all these athletes, I mean from football to basketball down to talk about where the future of sports, especially in the African American community is going, because when you have loud mouth assholes like Rush Limbaugh talking crap, how do you expect to shut him up?

16 01 2010
ms Carla

THIS is my favorite post so far! lmao i gota say “Peppermint Patty” had me chokin laughing so hard. There was something online about a while back about this see through fooh taking pix with weed in plain sight in the background…soooo finding out hes riding around strapped like the Albino version of Blade or some shit was no suprise. Seriously where was he goin wit all them damn guns???? Its always that one that has to prove how hard he really is.
Gilbert Arenas should just disappear. Its not his year. First his baby mama is coming out as one of Shaqs jumpoffs, now this.Now if he pulled the gun on Shaq, i would have had less second-hand embarrasment for him. Finding out he did this dumb shit in the locker room OF ALL PLACES made me cringe like the shit was ruinin MY career. Shit gimme millions of dollars a year i bet you i wont do a damn thing to fuck it up.
Whew this got on my nerves. *woosah* anyway Nile, good piece. i enjoyed it as always. Youre hilarious. Keep them coming!!!!!

17 01 2010
tracy

I just dont get it this men played to get out of the hood,but wanna bring the hood everywhere they go…..soooo sad!

17 01 2010
Marlena

OMG……”I’M COMING UP TO OUR MULTI-MILLION DOLLAR JOB WITH A GUN TO COLLECT MY MONEY!!!!”………CLASSIC LMAO!

17 01 2010
Boomie

These are clear examples of reasons why they need to make basket ball players go to college before they are recruited, they really need to grow up and have some life experience before they play PROFESSIONAL ball, they are really just getting out of hand if its not one thing its another

17 01 2010
Jeffara

LMMFAO! I don’t know which one I like more! Ghetto baby names, chitterlings, or this one right here! Smh…truer words have never been spoken! These “ballers” are on some real bullshit fa that…there’s bigger issues they should concern themselves with(like Haiti)…but at least reading your blog can make us laugh at em instead of feeling so angry over their immaturity. You’re too funny!

17 01 2010
Jennifer Douangpanya

This shit is the guts!!! Keep me laughing Mister!!

18 01 2010
ArtApparent

the delonte west part was just perfection

18 01 2010
Ava

You HAD to quote Big Perm??? Man, that was classic!

18 01 2010
Carol

I was always under the impression that these “professional” ball players worked hard to make it so they could change their lifestyle and leave behind all the violence and bullshit. It seems to me that the only thing that seems to change with them is the amount of money in their pockets at any given time. Not that I’m asking you to guys to be role models, but at least start acting like grown ass men, which you always want to proclaim that you are……..

18 01 2010
Lala

yeah these ballars, musicians, and wannabe’s might have their millions and top knotch security…..but dont get it twisted nah you can take the boy out da hood but you cant take da hood out da boy….whats thats frase you told me?…”just keepin it REAL”

18 01 2010
Amanda Wallace

It’s laughable to even call them professionals, they are narcissistic morons. They inspire stupidity and now their purposeless lives will be looked back upon over a hand gun that costs them millions. Their burning desire to be “gangster” put them in a category with fools. The only gangsters in their equations is the NBA who is gangstering them right out of their hundred million dollar contracts!!

21 01 2010
FrankDiesel

I think this is another one of those “when keepin it real goes wrong” situations. In an effort to maintain their “realness” and “respect” they do the same things they would if they were on the block. Whats crazy is that people wouldn’t necessarily assume they came from poverty or the hood had they chose not to wild out.

21 01 2010
Angie Ramirez

hahaha! this brought me to tears…. from laughing! “DON’T MAKE NO DAMN SENSE” they taking the phrase ball til you fall literally….. falling off course trying to live a Thug Life. @stepupangie

21 01 2010
DeeAna

Niggas! Are we serious?!? I have no idea who any of them are number one, no disrespect but I don’t watch ball like that, and seriously…two guns ON you and a shot gun in a damn guitar case?!? That was just STUPID bro!

22 01 2010
PokerSnitch

Uh. Um. They were playing Poker. I plead the 5th. Jokes aside, they could have handled the situation better. Know who you gamble against, and their reputation. The golden rules ‘Keep your hands where my eyes can see’ & always determine how, when, and where to settle up the wager. Good Luck

22 01 2010
Sheila Mae

SLAP!! You could’t have said it any better Niles! People be blowin shyt WAY outta proportion when they make millions of dollars stressin over bullshit that shouldn’t even matter. Way to put their asses on blast! LMAO

27 01 2010
ali

it may have been mentioned above, (too lazy to do all that scrolling) but lets not forget about our NFL Gangsters… (YAY PLAX! way to stay in the game!!)

1 02 2010
Jacqueline @SuchAGoodThing

Lmao at the peppermint patty analogy (Delonte West).. Light bright and damn near white!! This ain’t the wild wild west!! Get over yourself silly rabbit!! Nobody ain’t checkin for you like that!! Good one Nile!! You are truly hilarious!! Thx for the gut busting laughs 😉

3 03 2010
marcus lee

DOES LEBRON RUN AROUND WITH GUNS ALL OVER HIS BODY?? NO!! He hires SECURITY or a GOON to keep one FOR HIM!!…..lmfa….you called gilbert arenas and o=white the softest in nba….lol

9 03 2010
Elizabeth

Like u said, they are spoiled baby ball players, but money just can’t seem to change alot of these athletes mentalites, no matter how many millions they make

29 04 2010
Deanne

SO damn funny! “No matter how many TATTOO’s you put on your ARMS HANDS AND FACE, you will NEVER be considered a TUFFGUY!” and “The only SHOOTOUT you need to be going to should involve a damn BASKETBALL you MEATHEAD!!” AHahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!

30 04 2010
limewire

lmao cool story man.

15 06 2011
Alex Lechuga

I totally agree …. These fools ain’t gangsters and if they were they would realize they have a good hustle and try not to fuck it up by pulling some youngster ass shit …. I throw thim in the FISH category !!!

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